Journey with me through a magical world (Chapter 18 | Book 3)

The 19th excerpt (including Prologue) from "Do You Believe in Miracles?"

Sep 30, 2024

Note: I live in Upstate South Carolina and have been without power, cell or internet since Friday morning, which is why I’m posting this a couple of days late. I just now was able to get past the debris to get into town at a local coffee shop.

Each Friday, I will send you the opening paragraphs from a chapter of Do You Believe in Miracles? (book 3). I will also break down the excerpt with comments about context, themes, and conflict. Finally, I will include writing tips. Previously, I did the same for Do You Believe in Magic? (book 1) and Do You Believe in Monsters? (book 2).

Though my series is appropriate for ages 13 and older, I’m finding that readers younger than 13 — and many who are a lot older than 13 — are enjoying it.

Here is a brief synopsis of the series: When Charlie Magus enters a fantastical world hidden deep in the forest, his life is turned upside down. The timid 13-year-old transforms into a powerful wizard wielding formidable powers.

Below are the opening paragraphs of Chapter 18 of book 3. My author’s breakdown follows this short segment.

Context: The company of twenty makes its way into the mountains, where a variety of dangers awaits.

CHAPTER 18 — WILLIAM’S STORY
James was back.
When Charlie woke the next morning, the Elder had returned to the camp and was acting more like his old self, chatting good-naturedly with Malina, Tali, and Ud. This was a big relief. A part of him had been afraid James would wander off and never return, and Charlie wouldn’t have blamed him. He couldn’t imagine losing the love of your life and then having to live centuries without her while she suffered unimaginable torment.
Resiliency seemed to be one of James’ greatest strengths. The same could be said for the entire company. The aftereffects of Amanussa’s disheartening tale had mostly faded.
This didn’t mean Charlie was lighthearted. He couldn’t quit worrying about his mom. Was she okay now that they had forced the Niddukk into hiding? Or was she still in the hospital? He went to his dad and asked him what he thought.
“My guess is Mary is home safe and sound. It’s probably around noon on Tuesday in Lowery, so your grandfather and grandmother might have already checked Mary out of the hospital and brought her home.”
“But you don’t know for sure? You can’t sense it or something?”
“I do not know for sure. But you and Garrick have been able to sleep with no trouble, which means the Niddukk must still be weak. If so, he will leave your mom alone. She is probably the last thing on his mind. After what we did to him, he will be most worried about you and me.”
Virgil ran over to them. “Soldat and Stinger are about to leave. You need to come say goodbye!”
The rest of the company had already gathered around the squire and his trusty horse. There were a lot of long faces, and Blue and Killer were especially distraught. Charlie reached up and patted Blue on his massive shoulder.
“It’ll be okay, Blue. When all this is over, we’ll go back to Nila and visit Stinger, okay?”
Blue yipped once and then wagged his tail back and forth one time: swish, swish.
“Travel safely, Squire of Nila,” Marie said to Soldat. “And inform the baron that all is well.”
“Yes, baroness,” Soldat said. “And please keep it that way. We will hold our breaths until your return. Among our people, you are the most beloved.” Then he bowed.
After watching Soldat ride away on Stinger, the company ate a small meal and gathered its gear. The mountains loomed tall and grand, but Charlie and his companions still faced a full day’s walk through the lumpy foothills before reaching the base of the behemoths.
“How tall are these mountains?” Charlie asked Marie.
“Some are more than ten thousand feet tall. And the farther east we go, the taller they will get. No matter what happens over the coming days, lack of exercise will not be one of our problems.”
“Ten thousand feet! I’ll have to eat a lot to keep up my weight. I’m skinny enough, as is.”
“Eat a lot … YEAH!” Virgil said. Then he turned to Zola. “Don’t worry. I took a shot this morning.”
“That’s great, Virgil!!” Then Zola jokingly added, “Losing weight will not be one of your problems.”
They started their hike toward the mountains. Like the day before, it was cool and clear. The road grew unkempt and then crumbled away. Now they walked on brown grass that coated the hilly terrain. The changes in elevation weren’t dramatic, but they were enough to get Charlie’s heart pumping. Once again, he felt like he was the only one getting tired. Everyone else seemed to lope along no problem. He might be a wielder of High Magic, but in terms of his physical conditioning, whatever magic he had was on the low end of the scale.
When they stopped for lunch, Charlie was more in a mood for a nap than food. After eating he felt a little livelier, but by midafternoon he was struggling again, so he went to Mal-Tal.
“Do you remember when you helped Garrick and me after we left Karenu for Shima-Shi?” Charlie said. “Your magic made us feel a lot better. I could use some of that now.”
“Of course, Lord Charlie,” Mal-Tal said. “It would be our honor to help you. It has been a long and tiresome walk. Even Mal-Tal are weary. Are you ill?”
“Not really,” Charlie said. “I’m just more tired than I should be. My legs feel like lead.”
Azura overheard their conversation. “I do not think it is just you, Lord Charlie. There is a weight on my body and mind.”
Sahoota agreed. “I feel it too. Lord Gar, we need to call a halt and discuss this.”
They stopped and gathered around Charlie.
“What’s wrong?” Garrick said.
“Some of us are not feeling quite right,” Sahoota said. “Charlie is exhausted, and to be honest, I feel strange myself. Is anyone else experiencing this?”
“It is the weight of the mountains,” Marie said. “Mountains can deaden magic, especially if you are not used to them. The first time anyone goes to the top of a tall mountain, they can get headaches and other ailments because the air is so thin. It is the same way with magic-wielders who are not used to it, even at the lower heights. Within a day or so, this should fade.”
End of excerpt.

Themes: Acclimation; the magic of mountains; pushing physical limits.

Between the lines: In my six-book epic fantasy The Death Wizard Chronicles, there are three realms. Put simply, they are Life (living beings), Death (ghosts), and UnDeath (demons). The realms are separated by a cosmic fabric that limits the ability of ghosts and demons to mess with the living. They are only able to bleed a small portion of their powers into the Realm of the Life (which pisses them off to no end).

Whether you call such things realms, dimensions, or the multiverse, they present an interesting challenge for writers of fantasy, science fiction, and horror in regard to setting the rules on the how’s and why’s of who can go where and when. Do only elite beings have this gift? Does it require magical devices? Or are there hidden portals waiting to be discovered?

What if the fabric is impenetrable in all ways except that you can see through it? If so, a ghost could terrorize you without making a sound. Or maybe the fabric is opaque but allows odors to seep through. That could be creepy too. Or maybe it only allows the sensation of touch. Like a cold hand brushing your cheek.

In terms of creating magical worlds, this treasure trove of possibilities provides an array of intriguing opportunities for novelists. For those of us who enjoy such things, it’s loads of fun!

Writing tips: In reality, it’s really not that difficult to switch from writing epic fantasy novels for adults to novels appropriate for young teens.

Eliminate profanity except for the occasional damn or crap.
Eliminate sex (put that way, it sounds a little cruel 😃).
Tone down the graphic violence. There can still be plenty of violence, but avoid heads being lopped off and intestines spilling out of gaping wounds.

My experience is that parents nowadays won’t tolerate profanity or sex but are okay with Harry Potter-caliber violence. Seems a bit upside down to me, but it is what it is.

Past episodes of Book 3 (Do You Believe in Miracles?)

Past episodes of Book 2 (Do You Believe in Monsters?)

Past episodes of Book 1 (Do You Believe in Magic?)

Promotional notes

For those who prefer novels that cater to mature audiences, my six-book epic fantasy The Death Wizard Chronicles is well worth a look. Here’s a brief synopsis:

For a thousand years, none have rivaled the power of Torg, known as the Death Wizard, as he ruled his people and kept peace on Triken. Now a new threat has arisen. The evil sorcerer Invictus is greater even than Torg, and his greed and ambition threaten to engulf the land in eternal darkness. When Invictus imprisons Torg in a horrifying pit bored into the solid rock of a frozen mountain, the fate of Triken hangs in the balance. Torg becomes freedom's final hope, but first he must die to earn the victory.

THE DEATH WIZARD CHRONICLES (18 and older)

Book 1: Forged in Death
Book 2: Chained by Fear
Book 3: Shadowed by Demons
Book 4: Torn by War
Book 5: Blinded by Power
Book 6: Healed by Hope

My latest series, Dark Circles, is appropriate for ages 13 and older, but readers as young as 10 and as old as 80 have told me they loved it — sort of like the Harry Potter series or C.S. Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia. This heartfelt coming of age saga has won eleven international awards.

DARK CIRCLES (13 and older)
Book 1: Do You Believe in Magic?
Book 2: Do You Believe in Monsters?
Book 3: Do You Believe in Miracles?

All told, almost 28,000 copies of books 1-3 of Dark Circles have been purchased, with an additional 107,000+ pages read on Kindle Edition Normalized Pages (KENP).

Jim Melvin's Realms of Fantasy

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