Journey with me through a magical world (Chapter 9 | Book 3)

The 10th excerpt (including Prologue) from "Do You Believe in Miracles?"

Jul 26, 2024

Each Friday, I will send you the opening paragraphs from a chapter of Do You Believe in Miracles? (book 3). I will also break down the excerpt with comments about context, themes, and conflict. Finally, I will include writing tips. Previously, I did the same for Do You Believe in Magic? (book 1) and Do You Believe in Monsters? (book 2).

Though my series is appropriate for ages 13 and older, I’m finding that readers younger than 13 — and many who are a lot older than 13 — are enjoying it.

Here is a brief synopsis of the series: When Charlie Magus enters a fantastical world hidden deep in the forest, his life is turned upside down. The timid 13-year-old transforms into a powerful wizard wielding formidable powers.

Below are the opening paragraphs of Chapter 9 of book 3. My author’s breakdown follows this short segment.

Context: Zola is conflicted over her role in defeating the Niddukk. Meanwhile, the company continues its quest and encounters an unexpected but deeply needed ally — the Hakus.

CHAPTER 9 — THE HAKUS’ STORY
Morning nudged the night aside.
The company ate a small breakfast, gathered its gear, and continued its trek through the forest. Blue and Killer trotted ahead to make sure the way was safe.
The sky was cloudy and the air damp and cool. Was it about to rain? Zola didn’t remember it raining much during her visits to Pacchann, though sometimes it had been so hot, she would have welcomed it.
Zola thought back to the previous night when Azura had suggested they take time to ponder James’ tale of the maze. She didn’t know how the rest of them were feeling about it now, but the story had continued to grow on her mind during the rest of the morning. She wished she could have seen the maze from above and studied its design. Though the Niddukk had used it for evil, it must have been an amazing feat of engineering.
There is a way you can see it.
“Huh? What?”
James appeared beside her. “I can implant a picture in your memory if you give me permission to do so.”
“How did you know I was thinking about the maze?” Zola said. “Can you read my mind?”
“No, I cannot. But I am good at reading a person’s expressions. And I also knew the story would fascinate you more than the others.”
“How could you know that?”
“We all have our fated roles. What they might be remains to be seen. But the ancient prophecies foretell of a scholar who will speak the words of magic that will unbind the Niddukk’s conjurations.”
“Why does everyone think I’m the scholar? I speak English and a few words of Thai. I’m not a linguist.”
Mal-Tal joined their conversation. “May we interrupt?” they said to Zola.
“Of course. But I don’t know what you or anyone can say to convince me that I’m something special. If anything, it just makes me more nervous. If my role is so important, who’s to say I won’t fail everyone?”
Mal-Tal did the Dvi version of a grimace. “Your abilities will not arise from years of study. The gift was born into you, and it will flow from you as naturally as magic flows from Lord Charlie.”
“And if it doesn’t?”
“You will not be alone,” Mal-Tal said. “Others will be with you.”
“I’m scared,” Zola admitted.
“We are all scared,” James said.
“You don’t seem scared.”
“I have had many long years to learn how to conceal my fear.”
Virgil was the next to join the conversation. “Don’t be scared, little lady. I’ll protect you.”
This made Zola chuckle.
“You’ve protected me many times already, Virgil.”
Charlie and Blue came beside Zola, and when they did, the others—even James—separated from her and drifted apart. Charlie put his arm around her.
“Remember what I said to you yesterday about things being held back from you?”
“Yes, and now I better understand why.”
Charlie squeezed her shoulder. “Try to think of it like this, Zola. The members of this company are a team, and whether the team wins or loses will not come down to one person’s success or failure. We will win as a team or lose as a team. What I’m saying is, if one of us falters, the rest will be there to pick up the pieces.”
“You’ll be there to protect me?”
“Yes. And vice versa.”
End of excerpt.

Themes: Responsibility; anxiety; teamwork.

Between the lines: Chapter nine is about 200,000 words into the series. The Dark Circles trilogy is about 270,000 words in total, minuscule by George R.R. Martin standards but long enough to have fleshed out most of my main characters. Readers who have come this far should know Charlie, Zola, Virgil, and crew quite well. But even this late in the game, new characters continue to emerge that are important to the story. Why? Because the plot demands it. But more importantly, because the world is rich enough to contain them.

Writing tips: We all have our strengths and weaknesses, right? The same goes for characters in epic fantasy. You’ll see over and over in fantasy that it’s most often not the most physically or magically powerful character who saves the day but rather the character with the greatest inner strength.

This makes it imperative for authors to unveil scenes early on and throughout the narrative that deepen the reader’s respect for emotional fortitude.

Past episodes of Book 3 (Do You Believe in Miracles?)

Past episodes of Book 2 (Do You Believe in Monsters?)

Past episodes of Book 1 (Do You Believe in Magic?)

Promotional notes

My teen fantasy adventure series Dark Circles is the winner of Best Book Series in the 2024 LitStar Book Awards (see very cool video above). Meanwhile, Do You Believe in Magic? is one of six finalists in Fantasy in the Killer Nashville Silver Falchion Awards; the top winners in each category of Killer Nashville will be announced in a few weeks. Both contests received hundreds of entries.

Dark Circles is appropriate for ages 13 and older, but readers as young as 10 and as old as 80 have told me they loved it — sort of like the Harry Potter series or C.S. Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia. All three books of my series are now available in four formats: ebook, paperback, hardcover, and audiobook. This heartfelt coming of age series has won ten international awards.

Do You Believe in Magic? has been included in Amazon’s Prime Reading program from June 1, 2024 through Aug. 31, 2024. If you are a Prime member, you can read the book for free.

DARK CIRCLES
Book 1: Do You Believe in Magic? (debuted May 25, 2023)
Book 2: Do You Believe in Monsters? (debuted Oct. 30, 2023)
Book 3: Do You Believe in Miracles? (debuted April 21, 2024)

All told, more than 23,000 copies of books 1-3 have been downloaded, with an additional 86,000 pages read on Kindle Edition Normalized Pages (KENP).

Jim Melvin's Realms of Fantasy

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